How Do We Love Those Who Do Not Love Us Back?
Good Morning Friends,
A survey release at the beginning of 2016 indicates that the majority of Americans are angrier today than they were a year ago. Some think it is linked to a decline in the belief in the American Dream. Whites were the angriest and then Hispanics and then Blacks. 77% of Republicans and 67% of Democrats say they get angry at least once a day. 53% of women and 44% of men say they are angrier today than they were a year ago. Against this backdrop in culture and society, this scenario that seems to have the makings for a lot of unrequited love, we ask today’s question. We ask what kind of peace is God’s peace…what kind of love is God’s love? How Do We Love Those Who Do Not Love Us Back?
Scripture: ‘If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to those from whom you hope to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to receive as much again. But love your enemies, do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return. Your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High; for he is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Luke 6:32-36 (NRSV)
The psalmist wrote, “When I said, ‘My foot is slipping,’ your love, O Lord, supported me.”
Psalm 94:18 (NIV)
‘You have heard that it was said, “You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.” But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father in heaven; for he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax-collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Matthew 5:43-48 (NRSV)
For this very reason, you must make every effort to support your faith with goodness, and goodness with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with endurance, and endurance with godliness, and godliness with mutual affection, and mutual affection with love. For if these things are yours and are increasing among you, they keep you from being ineffective and unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For anyone who lacks these things is nearsighted and blind, and is forgetful of the cleansing of past sins. Therefore, brothers and sisters, be all the more eager to confirm your call and election, for if you do this, you will never stumble. For in this way, entry into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ will be richly provided for you.
2 Peter 1:5-11 (NRSV)
Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil. Thieves must give up stealing; rather let them labor and work honestly with their own hands, so as to have something to share with the needy. Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with which you were marked with a seal for the day of redemption. Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:26-32 (NRSV)
Jesus said, “Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. . . . Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.”
John 14:27 (TEV)
Message: The world tells us that there is a fixed sequence of events that determine our future. But with Jesus counseling us with His peace and love I have to believe that we are not set on an unalterable course. Without getting into a discussion about God’s sovereignty and our free will, let’s suppose for a moment that the mechanism of chance and our choosing unfolds a purpose and a call that brings peace and love. Friends, lay claim to the truth and majesty of God who loves us, chooses us…. calls us and justifies and glorifies us by being in us. Here what we do is who we are. And sometimes it is loving those we choose and sometimes it is loving those God has chosen for us. But it is never to be about being fearful of rejection. Moreover, Jesus is telling us in today’s scripture that it is our duty as Christians to love those who do not love us. He means that we are to show practical kindness towards those who have no claim on our affections, who do not evoke any sense of delight in us, and who are actually seeking our harm. It is a radical thing that Jesus is calling us to. Now one of the questions that ought to be popping up into our minds right now is, “How can we do this? How can we possibly do this?” Typically we love, either because we have been loved by the one we are loving or we love in hopes that our love will evoke a response of love from that person. But Jesus is talking about how we love those who don’t love us. So our reward is either absolutely not going to come in that relationship or it may wait a long time until it comes. How do we love in that circumstance? How do we live rightly in a world filled with so much anger and fear of rejection? How do we love when somebody is not going to give back to us the love that we are giving?
And in the passage from Luke Jesus kindly tells us to expect nothing in return from the person you are loving and that God will be the reward. Friends, only with our faith in God’s love and grace will we have a sure footing in these relationships. Here we learn that giving a loving response to unlovely actions… is what sets us apart as followers of Jesus. We are called to love the unlovable because that is what Jesus did on the cross. We have to believe that God is going to love us…that God is going to love us for the love we share. So we are to be merciful knowing that God will provide what we need. The proof of all this is Christ’s love in us. That is not to say that all we need is love but it is to say that love is the primary means we have of being in a relationship with God. Only when we love God in the expression of loving others can we love those who do not love us back. That is what Jesus did. The challenge of our calling is that we follow in His Way with the same love that Jesus had, connecting our love of God with our love for our neighbors, our enemies and those who will never love us back. Our faith is the basis of this righteousness. Mother Teresa exhibited it in service to those dying in the streets of Calcutta and in a poem often attributed to her summarizes the paradox of love. It follows:
People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway. If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway. What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway. Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway. In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
Friends, by living with confidence in the faith of God’s love, His power can help us to live with virtue, knowledge, self-control, patience, godliness, brotherly affection, and love. The process though unique to each of us always begins with faith and always ends with love….It is the test of life.
Pray we turn to God in the love of Christ who fulfilled the law and now give us a path with sure footing grounded in the grace of the King. Pray we grow in Christ like faith. Pray we repent. Pray we choose the way of Jesus.
Pray that our identity is in the unity of a loving community. Pray we live in peace as we experience His love and share it. Pray we love God with all our heart, mind and soul and our neighbor as ourselves. Pray we live with confidence in the power of God’s love. Pray we realize that unrequited love has a lot of the qualities of Jesus on the cross. Pray we realize that when it comes to sharing God’s love there are to be no haves and have nots. Pray we listen to the loving Counselor and not lose hope for something really great and beautiful and satisfying in our lives. Pray we pray daily. Pray we give thanks. Pray we dwell on the positive. Pray we are obedient. Pray we choose his peace. Pray we ask for greater faith and help in loving others. Pray we get over our fear of rejection. Pray we build our hopes on God’s unchanging love. Pray we risk to love. Pray we are genuine in our desire to emulate Jesus when it comes to loving people.
Blessings,
John Lawson
Daily Devotionals 